my mother and father in law are similar.
He is NRA life member, goes to range, has carry permit, has layers of security at home. wears either a John Deere or Remington cap, even in the house.
She could care less about guns. But she does realize there is danger and crime even in "safe" neighborhoods.
He does not "carry" at home. What he decided to do was arrange the house for defensive purposes as follows:
The Master bedroom has keypad which controls the security system. There is a Rem 870 in condition 3 along with a Taurus Tracker .357 and a mag lite should he need them in/around the bedroom. Also upstairs along with the master BR, there is a double barrel 20 gauge loaded in the guest BR which is the first room to the left up the stairs. It stays in the closet behind a garmet bag. Downstairs, he has reinforced all 3 entry doors with chain locks, extra deep dead bolts, and all the doors are solid (no glass).
Also downstairs in each of the main rooms (living room, kitchen, den, bath) he placed a Smith and Wesson model 10 heavy barrel revolver in a soft case in a drawer along with one reload each. The LR it's in the secretary. The kitchen it's in the china cabinet. The den it's in an end table. The bath room it's in the closet in a shaving kit case.
They are retired and keep the alarm on all the time. He figures if it goes off, he will retrieve an SD weapon where ever he is and go from there. They have been in the same neighborhood for 34 years and there have been two burglaries in the area over that time. One was in 1987 and one was in 2004.
My father in law is about the most practical man I know. Wouldn't hurt a fly either, but would protect himself and his family.