I thing you are well ahead of many folks who have not experienced failures when it meant something.
This is of great value because it exposed one of the truisms of conflict to you; Stress makes us beat ourselves, we can win against an adversity, we will most likely loose if we must fight an adversity and ourselves.
Push yourself hard, use this sport to expose your flaws and then correct them. It is one way to gain the confidence and decisiveness needed for what you may find on the street. For:
"Once the combat envelope wraps its' cold clammy arms around you, there is more than enough to think about besides how your weapon works, what condition of readiness IT IS IN, or where it shoot."
Good Luck & Be Safe
First, with the most, WINS!
Regards, Scattergun Bob