We deliver for you.
"There was a joke - though possibly a wicked one - perpetrated on a certain Chaplain in the army, which ought not to be lost to the clerical portion of the world. It was the Chaplain's business to look after the regimental mail. This Chaplain, however, had been annoyed exceedingly by the great number of warriors who were constantly running to him and inquiring about the arrival and departure of mails. To save time and patience, the testy official at last posted a notice outside his tent, which read: "The Chaplain does not know when the mail will go,' and with this he imagined his troubles at an end. The reverend postmaster was absent from the camp that day, and on returning and glancing at his notice, was horrified to see there conspicuously written upon his own door, read by multitudes during the day, in a hand exactly counterfeiting his, following the words 'THE CHAPLAIN DOES NOT KNOW WHEN THE MAIL WILL GO,' this addition by some honest wretch: 'NEITHER DOES HE CARE A DAMN.' It was a case of depravity the obliging and godly man was unprepared for, - but perhaps he and his warriors were now 'quits.'" There was no church services that Sunday or for many Sundays after that.
O.K., I traced this story to the 13th New Jersey Volunteer Infantry. The involved chaplain was Chaplain Theodore R. Beck.
Vigilantibus et non dormientibus jura subveniunt. Molon Labe!