"So say the recoil at the Kimber is more like 10ft/lbs, and the bullet has what...450ft/lbs kinetic energy?"
No, the recoil of the Kimber is still 450 ft/lbs. The difference is that the 450 ft/lbs of the bullet is concentrated in a much smaller, lighter, less flexible package than the 450 ft/lbs of the gun and the shooter. The velocity of the bullet ends up being much more than the velocity of the gun/shooter, but when you factor in the masses involved it all comes out equal. Think of it as pushing between a rock and a boulder. You have to push against the boulder just as hard as you push against the rock in order to get the rock to move. You can't selectively push 1 object and make it move, you have to push against something else just as hard.
Newtonian Physics. There ain't no such thing as a free lunch, even when dealing with things like firearms. You don't get more energy out of the front of the gun than out of the back, it just doesn't work that way.